Today I am announcing my retirement from hockey.
I just emailed my coach and told him that I would not be playing this year. Now I avoid my email for the rest of the day.
I started playing hockey when Tim and I were engaged. We were great friends with the teams (his and mine), and I really enjoyed doing it. The team I played on was mostly older women, just out to have fun. And it was for a while, then it changed.
I hadn't been playing for too long when I realized it was like a sorority on ice. There were the cool kids on the team, the ones who everyone talked about, the weird ones, the excellent players, the goons, etc. There was a big shake up of the Alpha Girls right around when I got pregnant with Abby so I was happy to bow out of the mean girls drama. Even when you are not directly involved with that stuff when it comes down to it you are put on a side. It was the first time I was lumped in with the Alpha Girls, and I didn't like it.
Because I was going to continue playing for this team after I had Abby, I never spoke up about how they treated people, and I wish I would have. It is a whole complicated story filled with a bunch of details that no one cares about, but the bottom line is that I am not cut out to be and Alpha Girl. Or a hockey player for that matter.
I will miss playing, there was something about it that I enjoyed, although it has been so long since I played that I can't really remember it. When I see Tim leave for his games he is so excited to go and play, and that was a feeling that I never remember having (if I even did).
So my hockey career is over and has given way to my other interests. The only person who could be more excited about this than me is my sister who will o longer have to listen to me whine the whole way to the ice rink when I call her to tell he how much I really don't want to play hockey.
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
The first step is acceptance....
My name is KAYO, and my child is dependent on drugs.
I was getting worried that we were going to have to check Nora into the Betty Ford clinic for her growing dependency on Benadryl. We are recovering from the Kukamunga Flu (my neighbor tried to look that up online to see if it was real, then called me to find out the symptoms. I think he figured out that it was made up when I told him that drippy noses, fevers ranging from low grade to ridiculous, clingyness, and bitching were some of the symptoms) so I have been pumping both ladies with whatever will make them feel better. Nora was doing well with the Benadryl, but then it started to not be enough- she would still wake up all night. Then I figured it out.
Not only has she started to army crawl all over my filthy house, but she has just broken her first tooth. No wonder I can't leave her sight without squeals of pain and longing. No wonder the first place she crawls is to wherever I am to whine about wanting to be picked up. No wonder I had to hold her while I butchered a birthday cake for my mother in law. No wonder she won't sleep through the night (even when drugged) anymore.
So now we have downshifted from the beloved Benadryl to plain old Tylenol. We will probably make the Folgers switch to Motrin for tooth #2 if this keeps up.
Yes, I am a pusher. I am not ashamed of this.
But can someone tell me what happened to my adorable little lump who would quietly sit in her bumbo and coo until she fell asleep? What is with this crawling business. If she keeps this up she'll then want to do something crazy like, I don't know, WALK, and I am just not ready for that yet.
Maybe I'll take some Benadryl.
I was getting worried that we were going to have to check Nora into the Betty Ford clinic for her growing dependency on Benadryl. We are recovering from the Kukamunga Flu (my neighbor tried to look that up online to see if it was real, then called me to find out the symptoms. I think he figured out that it was made up when I told him that drippy noses, fevers ranging from low grade to ridiculous, clingyness, and bitching were some of the symptoms) so I have been pumping both ladies with whatever will make them feel better. Nora was doing well with the Benadryl, but then it started to not be enough- she would still wake up all night. Then I figured it out.
Not only has she started to army crawl all over my filthy house, but she has just broken her first tooth. No wonder I can't leave her sight without squeals of pain and longing. No wonder the first place she crawls is to wherever I am to whine about wanting to be picked up. No wonder I had to hold her while I butchered a birthday cake for my mother in law. No wonder she won't sleep through the night (even when drugged) anymore.
So now we have downshifted from the beloved Benadryl to plain old Tylenol. We will probably make the Folgers switch to Motrin for tooth #2 if this keeps up.
Yes, I am a pusher. I am not ashamed of this.
But can someone tell me what happened to my adorable little lump who would quietly sit in her bumbo and coo until she fell asleep? What is with this crawling business. If she keeps this up she'll then want to do something crazy like, I don't know, WALK, and I am just not ready for that yet.
Maybe I'll take some Benadryl.
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
The Fair
O.k., it is later, we can talk about the renaissance Fair(e) now.
So I have been trying to pack our weekends full of fun day trips here and there since I can't get my act together to go on an actual vacation. Last weekend it was the renaissance Fair. Yikes.
I had this great image of us wandering through the Ren Fair as I remember it, jugglers and performers everywhere, princess hats, and good food. We packed up the ladies, grabbed Uncle Tony and off we went (with my ass wedged into the back seat between the carseats- more on that later).
Abby loved that we got to drive on the grass, but kept saying that she was going to stay in the car. After some coaxing (and I think a little threatening) we were all off to jolly old England.
Have you ever been to one of these things? It is kind of fun, but also kind of ridiculous. The people who actually dress up to go the the fair dance a line between cute/cool and freaky. The families who were all into it were fun to see. The mom and dad with their kids who haven't figured out that it is lame to dress up with your parents were adorable. The people wearing large black wings and chain mail are not. (I swear I am going to flickr the pictures soon, I still have to get the Black Light mini golf ones on there too...) I thknk that we noticed the costumes more than Abby did, but hey, she is 3.
We wandered around looking at everything, and it was kind of cool. But therer was this underlying theme of commerce that kind of bugged me. At one end there was this big pirate ship, which Abby wanted to go on. After paying $5, and showing her around, I wanted to ask for my money back. It was ridiculous and she would have gotten more out of watching Capitan Feathersword. Everything cots at least $3, and it wasn't worth it. Tim and Abby rode an elephant ($15), Abby rode the butterfly thing ($3), Tim and Tony shot arrows ($10), we ate frozen stuff in fruit peels ($15) and so on. Ithink it would have been more efficient had we just given them Abby's college fund a the door.
I remember this girl in high school that I knew who went to the Ren Fair every weekend. She sang or something and got all into dressing up. She was a freakshow, so I should have know that it would still be filled with freakshows. I felt bad for some of the little kids who had to dress up at their parent's request, or who were too young to really object. I really think that some child labor laws were seriously violated, but hey who am I to judge?
At least we got to go to the Brat Stop. (because I was not going to eat a giant turkey leg prepared by someone who hasn't figured out that the Ren Fair really isn't that cool.) On our way home Tim decided he was too tired to frive so he decide dto wedge himself in the back seat. His exact words were, "I don't know how you fit back here! I can't even get MY ass between these seats!"
He still doesn't think he said anythign wrong.
I thkn we stayed too long at the fair.
So I have been trying to pack our weekends full of fun day trips here and there since I can't get my act together to go on an actual vacation. Last weekend it was the renaissance Fair. Yikes.
I had this great image of us wandering through the Ren Fair as I remember it, jugglers and performers everywhere, princess hats, and good food. We packed up the ladies, grabbed Uncle Tony and off we went (with my ass wedged into the back seat between the carseats- more on that later).
Abby loved that we got to drive on the grass, but kept saying that she was going to stay in the car. After some coaxing (and I think a little threatening) we were all off to jolly old England.
Have you ever been to one of these things? It is kind of fun, but also kind of ridiculous. The people who actually dress up to go the the fair dance a line between cute/cool and freaky. The families who were all into it were fun to see. The mom and dad with their kids who haven't figured out that it is lame to dress up with your parents were adorable. The people wearing large black wings and chain mail are not. (I swear I am going to flickr the pictures soon, I still have to get the Black Light mini golf ones on there too...) I thknk that we noticed the costumes more than Abby did, but hey, she is 3.
We wandered around looking at everything, and it was kind of cool. But therer was this underlying theme of commerce that kind of bugged me. At one end there was this big pirate ship, which Abby wanted to go on. After paying $5, and showing her around, I wanted to ask for my money back. It was ridiculous and she would have gotten more out of watching Capitan Feathersword. Everything cots at least $3, and it wasn't worth it. Tim and Abby rode an elephant ($15), Abby rode the butterfly thing ($3), Tim and Tony shot arrows ($10), we ate frozen stuff in fruit peels ($15) and so on. Ithink it would have been more efficient had we just given them Abby's college fund a the door.
I remember this girl in high school that I knew who went to the Ren Fair every weekend. She sang or something and got all into dressing up. She was a freakshow, so I should have know that it would still be filled with freakshows. I felt bad for some of the little kids who had to dress up at their parent's request, or who were too young to really object. I really think that some child labor laws were seriously violated, but hey who am I to judge?
At least we got to go to the Brat Stop. (because I was not going to eat a giant turkey leg prepared by someone who hasn't figured out that the Ren Fair really isn't that cool.) On our way home Tim decided he was too tired to frive so he decide dto wedge himself in the back seat. His exact words were, "I don't know how you fit back here! I can't even get MY ass between these seats!"
He still doesn't think he said anythign wrong.
I thkn we stayed too long at the fair.
Saturday, August 05, 2006
God Save The Queen
We went to the Renaissance Fair today.
Abby rode an elephant, but all she wants to talk about was riding of the butterfly on the (wo)man propelled flying swings.
I am afraid of most of the people at the RenFair, but I am also a little bit intrigued by these freakshows.
We'll talk about this later.
Abby rode an elephant, but all she wants to talk about was riding of the butterfly on the (wo)man propelled flying swings.
I am afraid of most of the people at the RenFair, but I am also a little bit intrigued by these freakshows.
We'll talk about this later.
High Rollers
We had a night out last night. One of several we have been having the past few weekends. I have been meaning to blog about them, but time and energy slips away and I am left with blogs about poop.
Anyway, we went out with our local celebrity friends for dinner and a movie last night. I can't lie I was a tad nervous about seeing them since the last time we got together I had probably drank my child's weight in champagne, and recall some snippetts of conversations had that made me sound like a, for lack of a better word, dork. In my defense, it was Charles and Alpana's engagement party and we were feeling festive. Of course since I had more than 2 drinks in me I decided to pick up the most random person in the room. In this case it was this morose writer chick who is secretly not that angry despite how she comes off.
We actually had a lovely time, and I really did like her. Mostly because I defied her prejudgement of me. I am still adjusting to being under 30 and listing "stay at home mom" as my occupation in small talk interviews. I think it is because my answers is almost always followed up with a "that is it" from some. I digress. Before the cake was cut and the champagne really started flowing I could tell that this girl wanted nothing to do with me. I was dressed in bright colors, I am not a writer, and I am overtake she rejects about womanhood- all this made me more determined to be best friends with her. She kept ignoring my conversation starters, then she realized that she couldn't anymore, I am just that damn persistent (and charming).
It was actually my ability to talk shit about someone who is no more than 3 feet away from me that won her over. We had found a common frienemy that secured our bond. I feel bad for the frienemy because the night must have been really hard for her. Poor thing was watching the man she has had a crush on for years profess his love for someone infinitely more fabulous and interesting than she will ever be. (Shut up Charles, you know I am right) This poor girl wandered around this party trying to prove her status as "alpha friend" to Charles and was continually shot down. The only comfort she had was her longtime (like 9 years or something) boyfriend who still hasn't decided if he wants to marry her or not yet. (Hint: if he hasn't mentioned it by now, I wouldn't be holding your breath at this point).
Anyway, I was skittish about last night because I remember telling Alpana that one of the best compliments I have ever received by someone was that I reminded them of her. Sure I am not "brown", and I don't have my own TV show, or a really cool job, but other than that, we are totally the same person (oh, alright, I am fooling myself, but a girl can hope).So I didn't know if she was going to be like "I can't believe we have to hang out with this freakshow again" or what. (She probably was, but hey, I have that effect on people).
Anyway, we all meet up for dinner with her and Chach, and her brother from California, Sonny. We had a lovely meal (I don't think you get anything less when you are rolling with Chicago culinary elite), and Tim and Sonny totally hit it off (Which always makes me happy because he can be such a social retard) (Tim, not Sonny). We followed our meal with some creepy fortunes from Thai fortune cookies (ex: Someday you will realize how futile your life really is.)(Um what, was that really a fortune?! Yes, and it was Tim's which makes it even better) and a viewing of Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby. OMG! SO funny! Alpana came up with this great parallel to the protagonist, Ricky Bobby, and your president George W., which cracked me up. If you want the whole deal let me know...
So where do 5 people go after such an evening. Home to bed? That is for the weak and middle aged, we instead went to a night club.
Alpana wanted to give Sonny the true Chi-Town experience on his Make A Wish weekend(no he is not really a kid with Cancer, they just filled every second of his time with fantastic events like Cubs games and the 95th floor, and what not) so we ended up in this dark, bumping night club atop the lovely Sushi Samba. Now I had been to Sushi Samba before, but it was a blur (as were my days of living in the city). The night club made me laugh. Here I am in Birkenstocks and mom jeans amongst these babes who haven't eaten in 2 weeks and spent 3 hours getting ready to go into this club. Of course Alpana knows the manager and it is funny to see people trip all over themselves to make her happy. I kept asking her if it ever gets annoying, but I see her point that it is too much work to ask them to stop. Her brother was in heaven, there were all these hotties (like this girl that Charles used to have a crush on)all over the place and it was cool. The bathroom attendant who washes your hands for you is a bit unnerving, but hey, we all gotta work.
There were a few more surreal moments throughout the evening, but since this is the world's longest blog entry I will save them for later.
Bottom line, we love being tag alongs for anyone's Make A Wish weekend, so let us know if you ever have something fun to do and want random party crashers to come along.
No, really the bottom line is that Tim and I actually did something interesting on a night out other than going to an outdoor wedding for people we are trying to vote off the island on the hottest day of the year and drinking beer with Tim's hockey team in a shitty bar.
Anyway, we went out with our local celebrity friends for dinner and a movie last night. I can't lie I was a tad nervous about seeing them since the last time we got together I had probably drank my child's weight in champagne, and recall some snippetts of conversations had that made me sound like a, for lack of a better word, dork. In my defense, it was Charles and Alpana's engagement party and we were feeling festive. Of course since I had more than 2 drinks in me I decided to pick up the most random person in the room. In this case it was this morose writer chick who is secretly not that angry despite how she comes off.
We actually had a lovely time, and I really did like her. Mostly because I defied her prejudgement of me. I am still adjusting to being under 30 and listing "stay at home mom" as my occupation in small talk interviews. I think it is because my answers is almost always followed up with a "that is it" from some. I digress. Before the cake was cut and the champagne really started flowing I could tell that this girl wanted nothing to do with me. I was dressed in bright colors, I am not a writer, and I am overtake she rejects about womanhood- all this made me more determined to be best friends with her. She kept ignoring my conversation starters, then she realized that she couldn't anymore, I am just that damn persistent (and charming).
It was actually my ability to talk shit about someone who is no more than 3 feet away from me that won her over. We had found a common frienemy that secured our bond. I feel bad for the frienemy because the night must have been really hard for her. Poor thing was watching the man she has had a crush on for years profess his love for someone infinitely more fabulous and interesting than she will ever be. (Shut up Charles, you know I am right) This poor girl wandered around this party trying to prove her status as "alpha friend" to Charles and was continually shot down. The only comfort she had was her longtime (like 9 years or something) boyfriend who still hasn't decided if he wants to marry her or not yet. (Hint: if he hasn't mentioned it by now, I wouldn't be holding your breath at this point).
Anyway, I was skittish about last night because I remember telling Alpana that one of the best compliments I have ever received by someone was that I reminded them of her. Sure I am not "brown", and I don't have my own TV show, or a really cool job, but other than that, we are totally the same person (oh, alright, I am fooling myself, but a girl can hope).So I didn't know if she was going to be like "I can't believe we have to hang out with this freakshow again" or what. (She probably was, but hey, I have that effect on people).
Anyway, we all meet up for dinner with her and Chach, and her brother from California, Sonny. We had a lovely meal (I don't think you get anything less when you are rolling with Chicago culinary elite), and Tim and Sonny totally hit it off (Which always makes me happy because he can be such a social retard) (Tim, not Sonny). We followed our meal with some creepy fortunes from Thai fortune cookies (ex: Someday you will realize how futile your life really is.)(Um what, was that really a fortune?! Yes, and it was Tim's which makes it even better) and a viewing of Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby. OMG! SO funny! Alpana came up with this great parallel to the protagonist, Ricky Bobby, and your president George W., which cracked me up. If you want the whole deal let me know...
So where do 5 people go after such an evening. Home to bed? That is for the weak and middle aged, we instead went to a night club.
Alpana wanted to give Sonny the true Chi-Town experience on his Make A Wish weekend(no he is not really a kid with Cancer, they just filled every second of his time with fantastic events like Cubs games and the 95th floor, and what not) so we ended up in this dark, bumping night club atop the lovely Sushi Samba. Now I had been to Sushi Samba before, but it was a blur (as were my days of living in the city). The night club made me laugh. Here I am in Birkenstocks and mom jeans amongst these babes who haven't eaten in 2 weeks and spent 3 hours getting ready to go into this club. Of course Alpana knows the manager and it is funny to see people trip all over themselves to make her happy. I kept asking her if it ever gets annoying, but I see her point that it is too much work to ask them to stop. Her brother was in heaven, there were all these hotties (like this girl that Charles used to have a crush on)all over the place and it was cool. The bathroom attendant who washes your hands for you is a bit unnerving, but hey, we all gotta work.
There were a few more surreal moments throughout the evening, but since this is the world's longest blog entry I will save them for later.
Bottom line, we love being tag alongs for anyone's Make A Wish weekend, so let us know if you ever have something fun to do and want random party crashers to come along.
No, really the bottom line is that Tim and I actually did something interesting on a night out other than going to an outdoor wedding for people we are trying to vote off the island on the hottest day of the year and drinking beer with Tim's hockey team in a shitty bar.
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
Down Time
Tim worked at Great lakes yesterday and today, thus making his commute home a little over an hour- no big since he was able to leave early.
Upon his arrival home yesterday at 5pm Tim told me he needed a "little down time", to "unwind a bit" before he could "deal" with the children.
What the fuck was his car ride home?
Was it not quiet? Was he not allowed to listen to the radio station of his choosing (which, I am going to guess, is not "Kids Stuff")? Was he not allowed to unwind in the car? Was there no one there that needed to be fed, played with, changed, entertained? Did he have a beverage that had no one's hands in it?
That to me sounds a little like unwinding if you ask me.
I am sure that providing for a wife and two children is kinda stressful, but if Tim took it any easier he would be dead. I am not going to be petty and talk about all the things he doesn't do (load/unload the dishwasher, mow the lawn, clean the toilet)-o.k., maybe I am, but come on, I am right here, right?
Let's talk about why we didn't leave the house yesterday...Global Warming. What the fuck is with this heat. We can do nothing outside because the baby will get heat stroke, and if she doesn't she is going to sweat off a few pounds which, contrary to popular belief, would not be a good thing. Abby is outside for 5 minutes and tells me she has to go potty so she can get back into the AC. Our usual at home activities no longer are fun, and we can't even default to baking because I have banned the stove from being turned on until this heat wave breaks. The mall playlands that we used to frequent are so clogged with other people's undisciplined children that they are not even fun, and the thought of the pool makes me want to die. I need a vacation from summer vacation.
I would even settle for a little down time.
Upon his arrival home yesterday at 5pm Tim told me he needed a "little down time", to "unwind a bit" before he could "deal" with the children.
What the fuck was his car ride home?
Was it not quiet? Was he not allowed to listen to the radio station of his choosing (which, I am going to guess, is not "Kids Stuff")? Was he not allowed to unwind in the car? Was there no one there that needed to be fed, played with, changed, entertained? Did he have a beverage that had no one's hands in it?
That to me sounds a little like unwinding if you ask me.
I am sure that providing for a wife and two children is kinda stressful, but if Tim took it any easier he would be dead. I am not going to be petty and talk about all the things he doesn't do (load/unload the dishwasher, mow the lawn, clean the toilet)-o.k., maybe I am, but come on, I am right here, right?
Let's talk about why we didn't leave the house yesterday...Global Warming. What the fuck is with this heat. We can do nothing outside because the baby will get heat stroke, and if she doesn't she is going to sweat off a few pounds which, contrary to popular belief, would not be a good thing. Abby is outside for 5 minutes and tells me she has to go potty so she can get back into the AC. Our usual at home activities no longer are fun, and we can't even default to baking because I have banned the stove from being turned on until this heat wave breaks. The mall playlands that we used to frequent are so clogged with other people's undisciplined children that they are not even fun, and the thought of the pool makes me want to die. I need a vacation from summer vacation.
I would even settle for a little down time.
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