Tim and I had a lovely night out last night, that deteriorated on the car ride home. While I would love to discuss it here, I feel like I can't. Not because he reads my blog, but for other reasons.
Sometimes being a stay at home mom with a husband who works all the time gets lonely. I crave adult contact and interesting stories that don't involve poop, which is why I listen to a lot of NPR (until Abby gets pissy and demands to listen to the Marie Antoinette Soundtrack so we can dance). Sometimes I just want to tell someone about how delicious Nora is or how funny Abby is, or how irritating my mom is, and there is no one around to tell. This isolation is kind of what led me to blogging as a "hobby". All these wonderful and ridiculous and frustrating things happen in my day to day life and sometimes I need to put them somewhere, and that somewhere is here.
While I realize that I don't have quite the same readership as Perez Hilton, and I rarely check my stats (but I can guarantee that Charles reads my blog shortly after everyone of our phone conversations or rendez vous just to see if I am blogging about him) I know that I have made some little Internet friends (one of whom I referenced last night at dinner which was kind of funny), and that most of my sister's loyal readers check me out sometimes (hi Laura, happy belated birthday-Abby and I can't wait to see you next week!you too, Karen). This eases the sense of loneliness that being home all day brings, which is fantastic.
I also really like the effects of blogging. I have found that typing out posts (even if I don't post them) is somewhat therapeutic, and that once I am able to get my knee jerk reactions to things out into the vast vast Internet, I feel better and am able to deal with things a bit better. Since I do see that airing all of our dirty laundry for the entire Internet to see may not be the best idea, I keep a lot of it in the laundry basket here at home.
Tim and I have hit a rocky patch in our relationship, and I need to talk about it, but is my blog (which he doesn't read) the best place to do it? Is it possible to blog about the trials and tribulations of my life without inadvertently offending someone?
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2 comments:
i like blogging too...i've found it therapeutic with the move. i could see how discussing maritial stuff could get dicey though.
i feel like i have to censor alot of family (extended family) stuff because my blog is so unique (not that many of use inter-racial couples living the expat life in Switzerland). i could make it non-searchable, but then i'd miss out on meeting other expats...so there you go.
(of course, you luck out and don't have to read about my bitching about my in-laws nearly as much as i'd like to).
= )
I listen to NPR all day long too. Actually, I do the same thing you do. I alternate between NPR and some kind of dancy kids' music to keep them happy.
I think that the fact that a lot of people you know in real life read your blog makes it difficult to talk about your relationship. I don't think anyone I know knows about my blog which I feel gives me a certain freedom, but I can see how it would also be nice to have people you know check in. It depends.
Anyway, I'm glad you started a blog, I'm glad we are "internet friends" and I hope that your rough patch starts to smooth out a bit. If you tell him you need more communication, is he receptive? Good luck!
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