The Great Flood of 2006

Hi, remember me?

So we come home today, and Abby makes her beeline to the potty, as she does when we come home from running umteen errands. I go to change the baby, and call my sister back. I get about 2 seconds into these projects when Abby starts wailing from the bathroom and comes running in to tell me, "The water keeps coming when I flush!"
Oh shit.
I hang up with sister, grab the babe and check out the damage.
Oh shit.
Water is flowing from the toilet, Abby is screaming, I put the baby down and she starts screaming, I wanted to start screaming, but someone had to remain calm. I shut off the water, and went to calm the screaming children. I got them under control, and went to assess the situation.
Oh shit.
Water was rolling out of the bathroom into the hallway almost to Abby's room. I decided to start at the source by plunging the toilet. Yum. Abby was still freaking out so I decided to show her how I fixed it. Still not enough, the kid was traumatized. The baby was fussy so I threw some towels down so that I could feed her, had Abby get some library books, and read to the girls for a while before lunch. Once everyone was calm for a minute I decided to tackle the flood. I called Tim to see if he had any insight, and was pissed to have him not answer his cell (I don't call his office, long story), so I decide to shoot him an email. I run downstairs to my computer and all I can hear is drip, drip, drip....the water is leaking through the floor boards into the basement.
Oh shit.
There was water everywhere, running down the TV, dripping onto the extraneous computer bits in the office,dripping into the play kitchen. I grabbed some buckets and towels and did my best not to just pour gasoline all over the house and light it on fire.
I fed the girls lunch, did a bit more reading and got the babe down for her nap. I cleaned up the rest of the bathroom and started to get to work on the basement. My mom came over so that I could help her with some poster she needed to make for the church and was entertaining Abby while I was mopping up. Abby wandered downstairs and asked me if the toilet was still broken, I told her it was ok, but she wanted me to come and look. We flushed it together, and she was satisfied with that and turned to me and said, "You can go away mommy, I need to make some poop."
Thank God I didn't have to clean that up.

Tim is now trying to get as much of the water as he can out of the carpet before it starts to grow mold. He claims that the padding is safe, but the carpet needs to be pulled up in order for it all to dry properly. If he thinks I am moving the fucking TV to do that he is wrong, wrong, wrong.

I think it is time to move.