Overachievers

If it was not evident by this picture:

My little Eleanor is not feeling well. She spent all day yesterday with snot running out of her nose and whining when she wasn't either attached to me or sleeping. (2 naps in one day! My house is almost clean!) Today was a bit worse, but I have never been that mom who rushes off to the pediatrician at every runny nose and sniffle. I took Abby sledding while my mom held Nora (the only thing the poor baby wanted to do all day) but when we got home it was apparent that Nora was not doing any better. I finally sucked it up and called the doctor. I scheduled an appointment for tomorrow morning then called back 5 minutes later to see if they could see her tonight. Off we went to ENH to have my babe checked out.
They did their whole triage bit, asking why I waited so long to bring her in (she had a check up last week! the runny nose had been going since September! every time I call they tell me the same damn thing- a cool mist humidifier and Tylenol!). When the doctor looked in her ears she exclaimed "Wow! That is the worst ear infection I have seen this season!" I aim to please. So not only does my little monkey have a "bulging ear infection" but she has a touch of RSV. No wonder she is miserable. She was prescribed an antibiotic and ear drops with the specific instructions not to put anything in her ear if there is blood or pus coming out. Really? You think that wouldn't help? I think my head would spin if pus and blood were coming out of anyone's ears let alone someone I birthed.
So she is tucked in for the night with her first dose of antibiotics working their magic and her fucking cool mist humidifier humming away. Hopefully tomorrow she will start feeling better (and let me put her down for a minute). At least we gave the doctor somethign to talk about at dinner....

The Camera Never Lies

My friend Karen was kind enough to take pictures at yesterday's birthday extravaganza since I had my hands full and Tim was, well, I am not sure where he was, but I am sure it was important.
When I took the pictures off of the camera and was sorting through them, deciding which ones to post to flickr I noticed a trend in Tim's facial expressions.
This is what he looks like when he knows that his picture is being taken:

(Sorry, I should have warned you that you would need sunglasses to look at his white belly)
This is what he looks like when he is not happy about his picture being taken:
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This is what he looks like when he is reprimanding Abby:

This is what he looks like when he is not parenting:

My be all end all favorite picture of him is this one:

Seriously, what is that face?
Tim is kind of an intense guy which is often comical. He spends a lot of time spinning his wheels which doesn't get him very far. What struck me about these pictures was how mad he looks which made me sad. Now I know that Nora does not look that happy in a lot of the pictures, but I think it was because she felt like crap. Tim doesn't really have an excuse. What was there to be mad about? Sure the kids kept running on the pool deck which screams of a massive injury, but for the most part everyone was fine. I know his parents stress him out, but they managed to keep their nonsense in check. He didn't have to work. All he had to do was splash and play with is kids. I guess I have to chalk it up to my poor little Atlas struggling under the weight of the world.
At least we got a cute picture of us with our girl:

Let Them Eat Cake! ('Cause she sure didn't feel like it)

I knew that something was amiss at 12:30 this morning when Nora woke up crying. Now it may not seem odd that a baby would cry in the middle of the night, but for this baby it is. When I went in to see what the trouble was she smelled and it was obvious she was not going to just grab blankie and lay back down. I took her and changed her which is always funny in the middle of the night. She starts doing all of her tricks- waving and clapping, blowing kisses and doing "so big"- which always makes me laugh. She wouldn't settle down so I made her a bottle and we wandered around a bit, took some pictures, and hung out.

She just couldn't get comfy so I decided to bring her into bed with me where we cuddled and sang. This lasted a while then she was done and went into her own bed.

So 7:30 rolls around, Abby is up playing in our room while Tim and I try to get those last 2 minutes of sleep and I started waiting to hear from Nora. Seeing as this was her "big party day" we had a fairly tight schedule to adhere to and I was worried about her nap getting screwed up and throwing off her day. So I wait and I wait and wait, checking once to make sure she was still breathing, and waited some more. Finally at about 9:45 she wakes up in a daze.
Now since I am my mother's daughter I have to cram every last little thing into every second of every day, so when Nora woke up she was greeted by Tim and I as well as Tony, and my dear friend Sweet Charles who had come to cut our hair (don't ask, it is what it is).
By 10:30 Nora was back to sleep and I was trying not to be neurotic about it because I knew that she needed to be someplace by 1. I left Tim with explicit instructions on wardrobing, feeding etc. and headed over to my father in law's house with all the party supplies.
Everything about her party was great. There were kids there for Abby to frolic with. People were eating, drinking and talking. All was right with the world (despite the foolish hat my MIL gave Nora to wear)....

...until Nora gave this pathetic little cough and threw up all over me.
Now I didn't want to panic anyone so I just stripped her down and put her in her bathing suit so no one would really notice that my kid had the Avian Flu at her birthday party. I also tried to use her donning her swimsuit as a clue that we needed to move this little party along. I wanted some butter cream, but Tim had to finish his Skee Ball tournament or some nonsense and I'll be damned if I am getting in a bathing suit if there is no potential for a little tan (I know, I know, skin cancer, but there is the bacon theory).
So everyone swims, then its cake time.....


Can I tell you a secret? I think my kid is sick. She would not get off of me for most of the day, and although she went through the birthday party motions I think she felt like crap all day and wasn't into it. Tim keeps telling me that she is teething, but this doesn't look like teethign to me....

I hope that i haven't scarred her by forcing her to star in her own birthday party when she had the yuks, but most of all I hope she feels better. I also hope she doesn't mind if I have some more of her cake tonight......

Am I mad?

I had a dentist appointment today. A dentist appointment that was scheduled in November to fix a crown that the Mafia Dentist had installed wrong. I had this crown put on in order to avoid having a root canal because the last time I had one I told him that child birth was less painful.
Now I am kind of a wuss when it comes to all things dental. I am ok with teeth cleaning, but anytime they come at me with that drill I get a bit nervous. In order to circumvent any pain the Mafia Dentist perscribed some Diazapan (with 3 refills, thank you) to chill me out for this procedure. I took two and floated to the dentist's office where he shot my mouth full of novicane and all kinds of blocks and all sorts of other stuff that kind of hurt. When I was good an numb he drilled the crown off and realized that because the crown was not on correctly in the first place the tooth underneath needed a root canal.
Fuck.
Have you ever had one of these? They drill out a huge hole in your tooth and take little files starting as small as a thread adn scrape out the nerves in your tooth. The files slowly get bigger so that all the nerves are good and gone. The last one was the same size as the stud I used to wear through my tounge. Despite all the blocks and the needle into my soft palate it still hurt. A lot.
I survived and made it to the desk as I was leaving where of course they have to add insult onto injury and I had to cough up $450. So I leave and call my mom who was stuck with the kids for my "hour long" appointment that lasted 2 hours, then I call Tim who asks me if the root canal was "really necessary" because $450 is more than he "wanted to spend" on me going to the dentist. The conversation went down hill and ended with him yelling and me hanging up.
By the time I got home the novicane was wearing off and it was starting to hurt. I took some motrin and got ready to do bedtime with the girls bcause Tim was working late. I limped through stories with Abby with my mouth in excrutiating pain, but finally got her to bed and the motrin had kicked in. While I was on the phone with a friend Tim called but i didn't answer (friend was whining about a broken heart-not a good time to click over). So I get off the phone adn call him back and where is he?
Tony, any ideas? It is Thursday night....
He is at Flight. This stupid bar he and his dad have turned into the Mafia hang out on Thursday nights. He never worked late, he went there right after work to meet up with them, adn has no idea when he will be home. I asked him if he got his work done, and his answer was "I am working late tomorrow". Who works late on a Friday night? The worst part is that i would not be at all irritated if he had said to me when I talked to him earlier that his palns were to go to Flight.
So let me ask you this...who am I mad at? The dentist for giving me a root canal? His secretary for charging me incorrectly (this problem has already been rectified)? Tim for telling em he was working late then going out drinking?
Or do I have to take one for the team and not be mad at anyone?

Take 2

I really can't find the words to blog about Nora's first birthday. I can't find the words to describe how she joined our family and it was like there was always a spot there just waiting for her. I can't explain what it is like to not remember a time when she was not right there. When I didn't know what her sweet little face looked like. When I had never heard her giggle. Eleanor made her entrance into our world very quietly. Not in that Scientology silent birth way, defanitely not that, but in a sweet swift way that made it so that I can't imagine what the world was without her.


Happy Birthday, little one. You are my heart.

1

I have been trying since 12:02 this morning to compose a blog about the first 365 days of Eleanor's life. I just can't find the words.

While you were out....

I left at about 12:30pm (CST) today and gave Tim basic child care instructions (i.e. Nora gets a 6oz bottle at about 3). He was on the brink of getting them lunch (probably Happy Meals) and they were going to spend the afternoon together while Tony and I visited Tim2. Stupid me thought that Tim could handle it.
At about 3pm the text messages started coming. Tony and I both got the same one from Tim asking what was happening. We were visiting our ailing friend who got hit by a truck, what did he think was happening? Tony and I decided not to stop for lunch, but hit the store closing sale at the State St Carsons. Tony is always in the market for props for the theater, adn with his upcoming show there are a few specific things he is looking for. We meandered among the mannequin parts and then headed home. Tim called at one point to tellme Abby was hungry. Logic would dictate that he should give her a snack, but I guess that is my logic.
(Brief aside: this guy who has cut my hair still laughs about the time I was there getting foils and a trim when Tim called to tell me that he and the girls were hungry and asked what he should do)
So we get home and Abby is waiting at the door for us. Tim was holding the baby who looked a little teary, but it was about 5, which is her time of day to fuss so I thought nothing of it until TIm announced that he "broke the baby".
Apparently she had fallen and checked her cheek on the speaker. Hey, it happens. She was fine. Tim was not.
It wasn't the incessant text messaging, or calling that made me question leaving Tim alone wiht my pride and joys, and it wasn't Nora's shiner, it was the fact that HE DID NOT FEED MY CHILDREN ALL AFTERNOON! When I asked him what Nora had for lunch he told me that she had the bottle I made before I left. She missed her 3pm bottle, and Abby was apparently "not hungry".
Seriously?

The Games We Play

Last night Tim and I had his mom come to sit for the evening. I usually hate when she sits because she is, well her, and she can barely take care of herself, let alone my kids.

She got there before Tim got home from work and kept complaining about working (she has to fill in full time while the secretary is on maternity leave), and that she was not invited to the boat show this weekend. My father in law (I like calling him her estranged husband) is down at McCormick Place working a boat show that he has done for as long as I have known him. In the past my MIL has done nothing but whine, bitch, and complain about this boat show. About having to drive in the city, about parking, about the hotel beds, about having to be there in general. She would always threaten that she was not going the next year, and last year as their separation was evolving, he told her to stay home. Now it is the only place on Earth she wants to be. When I reminded her of how miserable she used to be at this thing she told me that didn't matter and that it was the principle of the matter. Principle, schminciple- she made the whole thing miserable, she makes most things miserable, why would he invite her?

This topic evolved into me asking her when she was moving back in. Now, I know when I ask this that it is poking her, but I can't help it. Before Christmas she kept telling me that she was going to move back in by the first of the year, and although she has spent 1 night there, she is not moving back in. When you ask Jerry he looks at you like you are asking him to share his house with the Avian Flu so I am unclear on why she keeps insisting that she is moving back in so soon. She started this song and dance about how he has told her that he needs to work on some more stuff in therapy before he can be the husband she "deserves". When I asked if she thought he was just making excuses because he is comfortable with their set up (he hasn't had to give her half of his money in a divorce settlement yet he still doesn't have to live with her or take her to Florida so he can bang whomever he wants) she got all defensive about how she can't be the wife he "deserves" yet either.
This conversation ended with me laughing at her.

When Tim and I got home, I checked caller id which is what I always do. I rarely listen to messages, but I do keep tabs on who called via caller id. I noticed his dad called. This is his game. When he knows that Kathy will be at our house he makes sure to call her on our land line rather than using her cell phone which is how he calls her even when she is right next to her home phone. I don't know if he is looking for credit from Tim for trying to maintain a relationship with his estranged wife, or if...I don't know what. He also pulled something similar on Christmas morning. When Tim called at noon to wish them a Merry Christmas his dad made a point of telling him that he woke "them" up and that "they" were still in bed, and then he asked if he wanted to talk to his mom, because she was "right there". We get it. You nailed your estranged wife last night. Did you want to scar Tim with pictures because this whole situation has not been scarring enough.
Anyway, I kept my mouth shut about Jerry calling until, of course, Kathy mentioned it as if to prove to us that he is taking an active interest in her life.

I guess all these games work for them, and I am guilty of playing along. I feel bad when I pick on my MIL, but i feel like no one bothers to call either of these people out on their nonsense. I guess that is just another game we all play.

Old Friends

Last week was like a walk down memory lane. Not the one outside my house, but the one that passes through my college years.

On Tuesday I drove out toward DeKalb to see an old friend/new mama, Heather. She and I met my freshman year of college and randomly stayed friends over the years. Our freshman year we both had intense relationships with useless men, and the time we all spent together bonded us for life, I think. Although we drifted in and out of each others lives through the next few years we randomly have stayed friends. She has a little boy who will be one in April and we got together to catch up and parent.

I had fun visiting with her, and the drive was nice with the girls. Time passed always makes things strange though and even though we are at the same point in our lives we just can't make it click. Sometimes I wonder if that is because there is too much shared history and that neither one of us can look past all we have seen in the other so long ago. We had fun parenting together, and the girls liked playing with some other kid's toys. At any rate, it was a way to spend the day.

Friday I went to the other spectrum of my college days and went to visit my old drinking buddy from college. She and her sister just bought a new place together in Rogers Park, which of course was stunning (she is an interior designer). Abby was at school so Nora and I trucked on down to my old neighborhood. My girl Brook is one of the best people I know and when we graduated college together we started down the same path but each of us took our own exit. She still lives the rock and roll lifestyle, living in the 606 and barhopping while I do what I do. For some reason even though we are at completely different points in our life we are still able to stay connected in a way that I haven't been able to with some others. We had a great time watching Darling Eleanor roll around on on their throw rug and getting all kinds of fuzz in her runny nose. What we lack in commonalities anymore we can make up in style and she really is dear to me.

Saturday kicked off my absentee weekend, and I went to a baby shower from a girl I know from high school. We weren't close then, but we got close later on. We used to play hockey together but she was one of the factors in that hobby falling apart for me. While we never had a falling out,a gain things just got weird (is this a theme with me?) and we didn't see each other for a while. She is having a baby in February, and it was good to see her, but the mimosas were better. Another friend from high school was there too. I haven't seen her in 3 years, but it was like no time had passed. I am still not sure if that is a good thing or a bad thing.

Saturday I went out with Tony to the birthday party of someone who I have met once, which should have been akward, but it wasn't.

I made some new friend in the past week too. My other mom friend invited me to join her book club so I trekked downtown and was initiated into this bizarre ritual of book club. The women were nice, the book was ok, and it was all kind of strange. I felt like i was in a movie, like the Big Chill or something, but I look forward to going back. Maybe it is just the Sunday morning out....

Last week was like watching my own evolution, which sounds strange, but it was. And it was good. I liked seeing the girls from high school and liked remembering who I was at 15. I liked seeing Heather and remembering who I was when I was 18. I liked seeing Brook and remembering who I was at 21. And I liked looking at my life now. As my old friend Ferris always says, "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop to llok around once and a while you might miss something."

15%

My mom is notorious for double booking, utting in, and being a republican. When I was a kid she would drop me off at the public library for the hour that she would spend with her therapist "Roger" since it was ill advised for my sister and I to be left alone together for too long unsupervised. I would wait by the entrance for her and there were many occassions that I thought that this was going to be the night that she did not pick me up. I would count the cars that came down the driveway and say "If she is not here in 3 cars I will start walking home". I blame the this feeling of abandonment for a lot of my adult issues.

When I first had Abby I became mentally ill because my mom wouldn't hold her. She just doesn't do the whole baby thing, which is fine but I worried that she would never develop the bond with Abby that i had with my Grammy. I feared that I would be stuck with Tim's mom as the Alpha Grandma.

On the eve of every election my mom calls me to remind me who to vote for.

Almost every third time I ask my mom to babysit, she screws something up and my plans get ruined (this does not go well when I have to work)>

I could go on about the things that my mom does that irritate and disappoint me, but today is not the day for that. For the last 24 hours my mom has been my hero and my saving grace, and has met and exceeded all of my needs. This happens only 15% of the time.

Yesterday she and I took the girls to lunch with a friend of hers. When she got to my house i was a tad stressed, and more than a bit overwhelmed. She took Abby to play in the falling snow, and listened to me complain about the things that I needed to do (especially go to the grocery store), but couldn't because of ballet class and an impending playdate that I had rescheduled twice and couldn't bring myself to do it again. And even though she tried to tempt me with a trip to Von Maur, someplace I desperately need to go to, but it would have made me late for ballet, (my mom is notorious for double booking and skating into places at the last second which has made me anal about being on time almost to a fault) we had a very nice time.

I took her back to her car at my house and scooted off to ballet only to come home to find that my mom had gone to the grocery store and got me the staples that I needed to get me through to when I could really get to the Jewel(s). She had also emptied the dishwasher. Once upon a time this would have irritated me, but now I welcome it.

Her greatness didn't stop there. Today I got a call from my friend in the hospital's mom. He had been asking to see me and his mom wanted to know if I could make it down this afternoon. Without even thinking about what I would do with my kids I agreed (something my mom taught me to do- say 'yes' to everything). I called my mom's cell phone hoping she would be free, but it is a craps shoot between the widows she tends to as well as the secret life she lives (she is NEVER home, I am not sure where she goes all the time but she is often a moving target). I left her a message hoping she would eventually get back to me at some point during the day and began dialing for dollars to find a sitter. Within minutes my mom called me back (before she went into her Bible study at a church she has begun hanging out at- not to replace the church that owns her) and told me that she would be there by noon and that she had no other plans that afternoon. This was twice in a very short timespan that my mom was who I needed her to be. Sure when I got home late this afternoon I could tell her patience with Nora's teething and constant need to be held was shot, but again my dishwasher was empty and my kids had a good day with their Grammy.

It is this 15% of the time that makes the 85% of the time go away, and for that I have to give her some props. Someone please remind me of this the next time she makes me see red.

The Jive

I have been an absentee parent this weekend, and I wish I felt bad about it. Friday Abby was whisked away to her Grandma's house for the evening which left us feeling strangely free even though we still had the babe. I had to go to a baby shower Saturday afternoon which is another post entirely, and I can't lie, I happily left Tim with the kids. I went out with Tony last night, and today I went to book club. The absentee weekend was capped off by my mom babysitting tonight so we could go out with Tim's cousins.

For some reason I have been feeling like the walls are closing in on me when I am at home lately and I welcomed the idea of being out in the world sans children, even if it was for a crappy baby shower (again, another post), a bizarre dinner with Tim's extended family, or a new book club.

Last night I crashed Tony's night out with his peeps and tagged along to a mini fundraiser and a birthday party. At first I felt bad leaving Tim at home, but he really wasn't into going, and earlier in the week when I asked if he wanted me to get a sitter he said he wasn't interested. I had contemplated staying home and looking at the thank you notes I have to write, the first birthday party I need to plan, the ironing i need to finish, as well as any number of other nonsense that I need to take care of around the house. I am not sure that Tony welcomed my company, but he was willing to roll with it, which i needed.

So we went to this theater company's fundraiser at this bar that they frequent. A while ago I saw this amazing play that they produced, and really supported the cause, however the quality has fallen off and I am not sure what direction they are going in. I don't think they are either. I had offered to help them, once upon a time, raise money and try to make this thing go, however there are too many cooks and not enough organization to make it work. Any advice I offer has fallen on def ears, but yet they still ask me to reiterate the finer points of fundraising. Last night I was cornered, and again told them to get their act together, something they have yet to do. I still bought a raffle ticket,l and did my part, but I don't think they made enough money to put up that "awesome new production" they are planning.

At any rate it was weird to be out with Tony (sorry pal, it kind of was). It was not like our Sunday nights at the AMC in Barrington (Tim and I alternate Sunday nights going to see movies with Tony, it may sound odd, but it works for all parties involved). I go plenty of places without Tim and do just fine, but a small part of me wished he was there because he would have laughed at my joke about the girl in the camouflage pants, and then cracked one about he guy who kept hovering over everyone, fitting in less than I did. I got hit on for a brief moment, which was flattering, albeit strange and uncomfortable. I was involved in a low grade hostage crisis involving the wife of one of Tony's friends. She and I have some stuff in common, and I wish I could relate to her the way that she needs someone to, but there is something, I am not sure what, stopping us from being BFF. I like her, but there is something that makes me just the tiniest bit wary of her. I wish I could put my finger on it.

From this bar we went to Tony's friend's birthday party. I have met this chick once, and she is fabulous in every sense of the word (right down to the Xavier Roberts tattoo on her tush). We feted her appropriately and then it was time to head out.

On our way home Tony and I got to talking about some of the folks we encountered over the evening. Somehow we got on the subject of how some couples "jive" despite what people see on the surface. Tony is the one person who knows about the jive between Tim and I. I know that I trash him up, down and all over on here, but really I am quite lucky that I have Tim in my life. Sure, he didn't put a single dish in the dishwasher while I was out gallivanting all weekend, but he knew when it was time to buy Abby a Slurpee and let us hang out in the Target Cafe today while I composed myself after a random phone call. As much of his crap that I put up with he puts up with mine that you don't see because this is my blog and you don't need to know about all of my tics, quirks and imperfections. Our jive is not just that, it is more, and then some, and it is ours- even if you don't see it.

Character Witness

For the past week a black cloud has been looming around us. Our good friend Tim2 was in a serious car accident which has kept him in the ICU at Evanston Hospital until yesterday. While his condition improves daily, we are still unable to see him and have been relying on a crude game of telephone for information.

Now we all handle bad news differently. So completely clam up while others will talk the ear off of anyone who will offer. The friend of Tim2’s who called to tell me about this in the first place has been very dramatic, giving up staples of her life to show her support and making him collages and shrinky dinks to help his recovery. Tony has been quiet, which is to be expected. He is kind of the “strong silent type” and likes to keep things to himself. My Tim, who was recently christened “Alpha Tim” when trying to discern between the two, has been a basket case. He has been very dramatic about it all. He couldn’t concentrate at work on Friday after I told him what was happening. He loses his appetite when he thinks about it. I am waiting for him to pull out his guitar and use power ballads to express his emotions, but for some reason “Every Rose Has Its Thorn” just doesn’t seem to fit here. I have been having a hard time just sitting back and doing nothing so I decided to bake some cookies and head down to the ICU.

Now I have never met Tim2’s parents before and I was a bit nervous about just showing up, but as everyone who said they might go with me continued to bail on me (and Tim2) I decided to just go and see what happened. It is always an event to meet someone’s parents; it is an even bigger one when you are standing outside the ICU. When I saw his mom, my heart broke. This poor woman had been through hell in the past few days and even though his health was improving, the details about the accident were not. Despite his inability to communicate, Tim2 needed a lawyer, and while I was talking to his mom I mentioned that the Mafia Attorney might be able to help them out. She was so grateful and wanted to call her husband right away because he was just getting started looking for one. I got him set up to call Alpha Tim and felt like we had actually been able to help out.

While I talked to his mom I tried to imagine what she must be going through, but I couldn’t. If anything like that ever happens to my children I don’t know that I could be as composed as this woman was. I don’t know that I could think as clearly. And I definitely don’t think I would ever let them out of my sight again. I also met Tim2’s sister in law- someone who I have heard a lot about over the years. He is not a fan of hers, but yet she is one of the select few who are allowed to see him. When I realized this I got a little irritated. Why is that fair? Not my rules I guess.

As I drove home from the hospital Alpha Tim called me to “give me an update”. Apparently he was having Tim2’s car moved to the shop and not charging him storage like others would. I though that was nice of him. He also told me that he was “lawyered up” with the Mafia Attorney. Now Alpha Tim really hates when I refer to myself as a Mafia Princess. It makes him angry when I call him out on us not getting actual quotes on work around the house and just using his dad’s guy. When we relandscaped we had to use Fucking Tony Norton (his is so awful that if he hasn’t legally changed his name to add the “Fucking” part, he should) because Tim’s dad owed him some business. When the furnace broke we had to use Ray, pay him in cash and we can’t have a receipt because it “leaves a trail”. It’s like the Mafia, really, and usually Tim gets annoyed about me calling it that, but whatever.

So all night long all he could talk about was how the Mafia was taking care of his buddy, and that he was really doing a service by getting the car taken care of. I got bored and went to bed early. But it continued into yesterday too. Once he saw the actual car that Tim2 crashed “it all became clear” to Alpha Tim what had happened. He came home telling me that he knew exactly what happened and that it was not really Tim2’s fault. I told him that he should relay that to Mr. and Mrs. Tim2 and he immediately freaked out about how if he gets called to testify he can’t be held responsible for reconstructing the scene. He could be a character witness if need be, but he couldn’t put his career on the line. I told him he was not Gil Grissom and that he should just try to ease the mind of this poor kid’s mother who is being made to think the worst of her kid. Tim still refused, but he “can’t wait” to tell Tony that he figured out how the accident happened.

The dismount of this conversation sent me over the edge, and had I not had Kappa Book Club last night I don’t think he would still be breathing today. He proceeded to tell me something that Tim2 mom had told me the day before and that I had told him, but he put his little Alpha Tim spin on it that made it much more dramatic that it originally was. I am serious when I say that I almost kicked him.

I understand that he was never given the tools to deal with crisis, but seriously, this is too much. Can he really be this much of a drama queen?

And can I tell you one more thing? I tried to blog about this Monday night, but I couldn’t because Tim was cleaning the office and singing along so loud that I couldn’t concentrate and you all know how I feel about that. I went to bed early and when he came in he reminded me that I forgot to give him a haircut and told me that he left my “crap” on the stairs because he really just needs the office clean. Really?! Because I need the house clean but that doesn’t mean you ever move any of your shit. Anyway, I also tried to blog about this last night, but once I got home Tim had been watching the “Keynote” and I had to hear about that for an hour because he is now an official expert on all things Apple.

Please tell me I am not a bad wife for thinking he is so irritating sometimes.

Today

10 years ago today I was in college and I was dating this guy who would later join the Navy after flunking out of college the second time.
7 years ago today I was working at the alternative school and probably having more fun in my "early 20s" than I should have been
6 years ago today I had just become engaged
5 years ago today Tim and I got married
4 years ago today Tim and I went out to dinner alone for the first time since we had Abby. I remember being very self conscience of my post baby jelly body
3 years ago today I have no idea what I was doing
1 year ago today I was hugely pregnant with Eleanor
Today has been a weird day. Tim and I are celebrating our 5th wedding anniversary. Although today is the actual day we (I) decided to "celebrate" tomorrow by dropping the ladies off at their Grandmas' houses. (We still have yet to decide who gets who. I am leaning toward Tim's mom taking the baby because my mom doesn't do well with infants) We have yet to make plans that include anything other than cleaning out our basement, and I think we are ok with that. We will get to sleep in and not have to go to be wondering if it will be a full night of sleep or one riddled with bad dreams, drinks of water, teeth or the always wonderful throwing up. This sounds like heaven to us, but there are a few things that are distracting us from our celebration.
First of all I am weaning Nora as we speak and although she doing quite well I am a wreck. I don't know if I just didn't notice the engorgement with Abby or what but I am noticing it now which makes me think that I am weaning her too soon. This sends me into a shame spiral for whatever reason about the formula I give her, and I can;t help but feel like I am gypping her out of 22 days of nursing (I was planning on stopping on her 1st birthday, but I stopped on new year's day instead).
Along with my engorgement (that really is the only word for it, and although it is not horrible it is noticeable which necessitates a word for it, hence engorgement, which borders on offensive, but it is just descriptive) we have another new development on the kid front and that is that Nora has started to take steps. She gets about 2 in then falls down, but she is really learning to walk. This is amazing to me since Abby started walking a bit later (after her first birthday).
We have also had a plumbing emergency today which has involved a large amount of icky black goo coming up from our drain in the basement. I can't do laundry (boohoo) until it gets snaked out, so of course I did what I always do when we have a plumbing emergency, I called Tim2. Actually I didn't just call him I stalked him because Tim1 (my Tim) started talking about moving the toilet which always scares me and Tim2 can either talk Tim1 out of that or give him a better way of doing it that doesn't involve moving the toilet.
Tim2 won't be coming to fix our plumbing anytime soon.
Apparently he was involved in a serious car accident earlier this week on the expressway. It is all so gross, the pictures so graphic, that I am choosing to ignore it for today.
But it still really sucks.

Your Turn

I forgot to say that it is now Indiemama, and Hollyce's turn to post 5 things about them on their blogs....Tony you should too, but I don't know where your blog is...
Actually anyone who reads this should do it and leave me a comment (really becasue I just like getting them) to let me know where to find it.

Things I Should be Doing

Do you want a list of things I should be doing? It starts with cleaning my house and ends with bringing peace to the world, however I won't bore you with everything between.
I have just spent the last hour and a half puttering. I have just been shuffling around my basement looking at all the things that should get my attention and blatantly ignoring the things upstairs that I REALLY have to deal with (anyone want to clean my floors? there is a weeks worth of visitors, food, and cat vomit residue up there and I can't deal with it on any grander scale than a Clorox wipe).
Abby is at a friend's house and I think that is the best place for her today. I have been feeling bad that I have kept her cooped up for the past week and a half, but I know that next week starts the onset of ballet, swimming, me going back to "work" and the routine of school starting again. While all these things are fun, it is still quite a pace to keep up and we should enjoy the downtime. Even if the downtime makes my house look like squalor.
So while I am avoiding the things I should be doing, I am going to cross off something off the to do list. A few weeks ago my cousin who lives overseas came to visit. It had been 15 years since I had last seen her, and I think our reunion went well. I do look forward to getting to know her more now in our adult lives than we did as children. She and I keep in touch via blogs and she has called my sister and I out on listing 5 things about ourselves that others might not know. So here are 5 things you might not know about me:
1. I have never lived anywhere outside the state of Illinois. I have visited many places, but I have never called anyplace without an Illinois zip code home. This does not bother me in the slightest.
2. I met my husband in a men's room
3.I have kept almost every piece of mail that my mom, dad, and sister have sent me form letters to me at camp to birthday cards.
4. I am completely and totally a TV junkie and I am not in the slightest bit ashamed of this.
5. I do not support the Salvation Army based on their monetary support of anti homosexual groups. I also avoid Cracker Barrel for the same reason.
Although I don't think these are 5 earth shattering things about me that most people wouldn't know they were the first 5 I could come up with. I keep meaning to fill out one of those 100 Things About Me things, just to see if I could come up with 100 things about me, but I just don't have the time. I have to go clean my kitchen floor.

Thank you, Gerald Ford

I just want to take this moment to thank Gerald Ford for making today a postal holiday and thus preventing my "holiday cards" from being delivered for yet another day. I really do hope that he appreciates that today is a day of mourning for him and that my postal carrier has taken his day off to reflect on all the things that Gerald Ford did for us in his time.