The Magic Number

I was talking to Tim's secretary yesterday and she was telling me about her adventures in new motherhood. She had a baby boy back in November and has not really adapted well to motherhood. She is one of those girls who decided to have a baby because she wanted to make sure she fit in in before she turned 30. The unfortunate thing is that she is married to an Irish guy who wants to have slew of kids, all within 18 months of each other. She was asking about how I liked the age difference between my kids then made a comment about how if her second one is a girl, then she would be content to be done having kids. I asked how many boys she would have before she called it quits and she told me she would have as many as it took. Seriously?
How could she go from having 2 kids to having "however many it takes"? I just don't get it.
this leads me to a conundrum in my life right now. How many kids are we going to have? Tim and I never had a set number in mind as to how many, but we knew we wanted 2 and we are open to a third, but kids are something that you kind of need to plan, or not plan on.
It is no secret that Tim would love to have a son. I don't think that he is disappointed in the fact that he has 2 girls, but I do think that he is looking for the father son bond that he never had. Is this a reason to have another baby? No.
At any rate, the idea of a third kid has been floating around, but seems far off, maybe in another ...I don't know...while. I mean when do you have another kid? Thank God the window for irritatingly close is closed, and while the door to too close for comfort is still ajar, I just don't have a good answer.
And maybe my hesitation means that a third is not a good idea, at least not now. But it feels like I have to make this decision soon. No one is forcing me to, mind you, but I feel like it is just one more thing looming around like the piles of paper around my house that I need to deal with.
Part of it I think has to do with the fact that this all that most of my mom friends can talk about. Mrs. Materialism just had her third little dividend, and as I watch her struggle with that new born stage I can't even imagine going back to that once Eleanor gets a little more independent. I love the age difference between my kids, but I do remember coming home from the hospital and having to pack a diaper bag and thinking how easy life had just gotten before I had Nora. Mrs. Materialism never really wanted to have 3 kids, I think she just got pregnant again because her husband doesn't know enough to wrap it up when he is busting a move while she is sleeping (this is true, Mrs. Materialism is completely convinced that she conceived #3 while sleeping- just one more reason to be horrified by these people).
Then I see Super Mom R.N. (one of the moms at pre school who I sometimes like, but then other times I want to punch her in the neck) who is pregnant with her third but isn't telling anyone yet because she miscarries easily. She is showing, and prances around reveling in people talking about her. She often "coffees" (seriously these people use it as a verb, it is so not right) with that bitchy mom who excluded Abby and then lied about it, who is also pregnant, but with her fourth (seriously, you need 4 kids? Really?) and when I see them at pick up they have some comment to make about how it is time for me to start thinking about having a #3. Once they tied to tell me that I wasn't getting any younger but I was able to throw my trump card of not being 30 yet. The problem is that they make valid points even if they are about the logistics of a trip to Disney World.
I don't think there is an easy answer here. I hate the idea of waiting 5 years and then starting all over again, but maybe that is going to be how it goes. I also hate the idea of having another baby anytime soon.
I guess it could be worse. It could always be worse...